It’s the first Wednesday of the month, which means it’s Insecure Writers Support Group day. The purpose is to share and encourage, express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak, as well as offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds! Make sure to check out other writers’ posts here.
Today I want to share my fears.
My fear is that no one will want to read what I wrote. No one will want to publish it and if I decide to publish it myself, no one will buy it.
I don’t think about this fear. It isn’t entirely conscious. It sits there somewhere between the cracks in my brain, invisible to my everyday thoughts. It preys on any hint of doubt.
This fear can be logically explained away as completely untrue. There are already people who want to read what I write. I get emails and questions about when my book(s) will be available. There’s even some evidence that I’m a half decent writer. Some of the things I write are readable, some a pleasure to read.
Why this fear? Why this doubt?
What do I do with it?
I keep going despite it. I keep writing. Chipping away at its invalidity.
I’m publicly acknowledging this fear, but I know I must keep going. Keep writing. Inch forward ever so slightly.
Because I know the alternative. I stopped writing and it nearly killed me. I know that sounds melodramatic, but writing is like oxygen to me. Other writers may understand this. I learned the hard way that my life without writing is empty and meaningless and unsurvivable.
Writing is my only path. And that is a scary realization. I will succeed or perish on this path, but it is my only option. The only one worth truly living for.
Feel free to share your fears in the comments.
Some inspirational words that showed up in my Facebook feed this week as I was preparing this post:
“Courage is feeling the fear and doing it anyway.” – Oprah Winfrey
“I’ve been absolutely terrified every minute of my life – and I’ve never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do.” – Georgia O’Keeffe
Want to show your support? I’d love for you to subscribe to my monthly newsletter, where I share my writing, some behind the scenes, and my road to publication. Last month I sent out an interview with my novel’s main character.